Some Mail I Found Entertaining With Commentary
Revenge of the PIrate Queen
From: AOhmann@GT.com
To: jkuhn01@msn.com
CC: reefhappy@yahoo.com, markjustinmoore@yahoo.com
Subject: RE: ladder theory
Date: Thu, 7 Nov 2002 08:46:23 -0600
Hi Joy~
Hey, I checked that "Ladder" business out last night at home. (I can't log
on to sites with names like "intellectual whores" at work, they're blocked.)
What a collosal waste of time that was- reading his rubbish. I feel
sincerely sorry for such a pathetic man, who is so bitter towards women that
he must refer to them en mass as "bitches." He is truly misled, and must
have a terrible relationship with his mother. His theory would need some
serious tweaking if he met Gary and I. "What is this attractive 28 year old
woman doing with this average-looking yet intelligent 39 year old man with
no money at all? It doesn't stand to reason! My whole theory has been
turned upside down!!"
[ed. note: If I had a dollar for every time I've heard this, I could quit work and write for
Intellectual Whores full-time. ]
It's pretty obvious that his attitude arises from his own deep insecurities
(read: failure with intimate relationships of all kinds), and I wouldn't be
surprised if he's a latent homosexual. Such hostility towards the opposite
sex often belies a deep desire to BE one of them. Guess we'll never know.
Frankly, I couldn't give a shit.
[ed. note: is it just me or did her and her friend write more words about it than would be indictative of
not giving a shit? As to the latent homosexuality. I am a 3 on a scale of 10 with 1 being perfectly
straight and 10 being perfectly gay.]
From one righteous Goddess to Another,
Annya the Red
[ed. note: I did not make this sign-off up to discredit this person, this really is how she signs her emails. Draw your
own conclusions, but apparently I have angered a pirate.]
-----Original Message-----
From: JOY KUHN [mailto:jkuhn01@msn.com]
Sent: Wednesday, November 06, 2002 2:29 PM
To: reefhappy@yahoo.com
Cc: markjustinmoore@yahoo.com; Ohmann, Anne
Subject: ladder theory
Gosh, you look like such a nice, good-looking guy in the photo. Lucky
picture, huh? Where are the horns? I appreciate your obvious intelligence
exhibited in your language and analysis, but I feel sorry that you've put so
much effort into a sometime-facet of the female/male relationship. Why
should females sleep with every guy we meet, simply because males feel the
need to do so? I can appreciate all kinds of qualities in men, but still
experience a lack of chemistry every now and then. Lack of chemistry =
slipshod blowjob on my part. Why put forth the effort?
[ed. note: i wrote back attempting to ascertain if lack of chemistry still got a guy a blow job as this would seem to
indicate and never received a response. Also the answer to her question is now in the Answers to Common
Criticisms section]
Good luck, from a normal, nice lady with normal, nice relationships.
Including a wonderful, sweet, non-gay, attractive, intelligent,
good-salaried, single male roommate who knows I'm attractive and enjoys our
close, friendly, platonic relationship.
[ed. note: if he's all that he's probably too good for her]
Sometime Coherent Airing of Personal Grievances With Someone Who is Not Me
"senderemail" => fatima770 (AOL IM name)
"subject" => "short criticism"
"message" => "One time I went out with this guy like twice. I mean he seemed nice at first kinda like honest and all that and had a phd
and learned a lot about the news and he certainly thought he was intellectual. But the thing is - he never got to know anyone else. I
mean he would stereotype like mad "women can be complicated or they can be whores" but wouldn't admit it. He would say
stuff like " the best sex I ever had was with a brazilian and a bosnian girl" and I asked " because they are
exotic?" and he said "no, they are all people" I mean if you are calling them that then don't then tell me this politically
correct bull shit. Or "you were in a lot of relationships?" I asked him "You think I am a whore?" I couldn't deal
with him at first because he passed judgement so quickly and I thought he just misjudged me. I know neither you or him are not going to
understand this but YOU ARE NOT ALL THAT.
I mean if a girl you liked turns out to be a loser, that reflects badly on you. If you had sex with a girl and it was bad, you shouldn't have
sex with her. Guys like you look sensitive, they look intelligent, but on the inside they are stereotyping bitches. I am so sick of this "i
am beautiful on the inside" shit. Why don't you go for some beautiful on the inside women then?
[ed. note: I don't understand this sentence either. She seems to indicate that sex with a woman could be bad. I'm confused. ]
And I can't believe this shit has gotten so much attention. You have one valid idea on the whole webpage - intellectual whores,
everything else is just women-hating self-serving propaganda.
[ ed. note: if my goal is to get laid(by women), isn't woman hating propaganda the exact opposite of self-serving? ]
Otherwise I think you know exactly who you are - I mean, I am not telling you anything new here. Other people have theories too, they
just don't take the time to document them. You have to get props for effort but you are way overestimating the originality of this material,
at least in the world at large.
[ ed. note: Intellectual Whores would like to note that it only lends validity to the Ladder the more that guys around the world
know it intuitively to be true. We are confident that there is a cave drawing we haven't deciphered about how all the
cavewomen like Dirk because he's got the biggest cave and the most furs. ]
Silly Girl Responds to My Automated Webmail Thing
"name" => "straight woman with many non-fucking male friends"
"senderemail" => "spielli@yahoo.com"
"subject" => " My straight male friends say you are a twit"
"message" => " Your claims are biased, unfounded, and ridiculous. You have no research to back any of it up. You only look at
things from one perspective, and you attack any other points of view. Calling all women bitches will surely improve you ladder standing.
That was sarcasm by the way.
I have more than two ladders. I have friends that I may or may not find attractive, crushes, relatives, idiots, and losers. Take a guess at
which one you are. You are merely justifying your poor track record with women by creating absurd claims to the public. All women are
not bitches. So stop whining about your lebido and get a life."
[ Ed. Note: This bitch is not helping the case that all women are not bitches ]
She then mails this:
"recipient" => "iw@dallaslynn.com"
"redirect" => ""
"required" => "senderemail,message"
"incomplete" => ""
"name" => ""
"senderemail" => "spielli@yahoo.com"
"subject" => ""
"message" => " "Your message has been sent to iw@dallaslynn.com
If it was nice then thank you, if it was a flame then SCREW YOU too buddy."
-you wish, in your dreams, and ain't never gonna happen-"
[Ed Note: If this person is over 14 years old, I only hope they die before they can breed.]
Honest At Least
"name" => "arian"
"senderemail" => "princessarian@hotmail.com"
"subject" => "interesting"
"message" => "Your theory is missing something.. Dont be a playa hater. I will use any scumbag for his money, cuddling skills or
whatever it is i want and that does not make me a bitch it just makes me smarter than you. "
If I Had a Dollar...
"name" => "Jillian"
"senderemail" => "jchevali@flemingc.on.ca"
"subject" => "WHAT???"
"message" => "dude, seriously i think you have way too much time on your hands...Instead of wasting your time spewing your brain puke on the net, you should go, get laid and try to ease some of that aggression...maybe if you found someone that, as you put it, is high on the ladder from both sides, then you would stop being such a dick about things...Anal retentiveness is not a great quality my friend...Not to offend you in any way, just a thought...oh yeah, you forgot that size DOES matter.
later."
I hate it when people say 'your' when they mean 'you're'
"name" => "elaina"
"senderemail" => "emurray@purdue.edu"
"subject" => "interesting"
"message" => "It's interesting because i was expecting to see a gorgeous guy who i would actually consider fucking...you are not. You're an ugly paled skinned dork who i think has been turned down a hell of a lot more than four times in his pathetic meaningless life. or...the women you are fucking are extremely unattractive and can't do any better. you look like you may have tits, cause your kinda chubby...not attractive, straight chicks don't wanna suck their man's tits...thats nasty. but you were right about some things, i personally am a self centered, conceited, money hungry "bitch". but thats the way i was raised, to go looking for the best, expecting the best, desiring the best. i don't think there's anything wrong than wanting the best. i have good reason to be conceited, i'm fine. you aren't. and here's an idea...since you "say" you have sex (jacking off to a porn video DOESN'T count!!!!!!!!!!)...before the next time you submit a women to total turmoil with your atrocious body...let them read your article first, and then if they still wanna fuck you and your 1 inch dick, well hey, you've landed on a gold mind don't let her go. i'm glad i had this chance to tell you about yourself, and it IS obvious that you've been hurt.............nobody is that absorbed with bashing the opposite sex you poor tormented baby. did she fuck your best friend? did she leave you for somebody more attractive? (which would be anybody) did she leave you for somebody with more money? (from the look of that photo your a broke ass computer geek). whatever the root of your pain, I personally apologize for whatever bitch crossed your stupid ass. ok."